Field Guides / Sales

How to get more from referrals and networking

Referrals and networking hand you warm conversations, and most owners fail to follow through on them. Follow up every introduction and every event contact within days with a short personal message that opens with something they said and proposes one next step, and ask happy clients for referrals straight after they've told you why they hire you. Warm is a wasting asset.

Why do warm introductions and networking contacts go cold?

Warm introductions and networking contacts go cold because they aren't followed up while they're still warm. The opens are easy, and the money leaks in the follow-through.

The opens look like a room full of contacts, a client introduction, a dozen cards from an expo. One member came back from a building industry expo with a dozen contacts, and twelve days or more later they were still sitting there. Another had introductions coming in from a networking group and from his own clients, and they sat the same way.

Owners chase cold outreach while warm introductions sit unanswered, because following up on a warm lead feels oddly more exposing: there's a relationship at stake. A warm conversation you don't follow up is worse than a cold one you never had, because it was yours to lose.

I split marketing into hunting and farming. Hunters hit the market hard, mostly with paid advertising, and rely on a percentage of people closing. Farmers stay in touch with prospects over time until they're ready to buy, and accept that it can take a long while. Referrals and networking are farming work.

How to follow up an introduction or an event contact: the method, step by step

The method for following up an introduction or an event contact is to capture each contact on the day, connect early, and send a short personal message within days. Five steps.

  1. Capture the contact on the day. Before you leave the event, or the moment an introduction lands, write down the person, where you met, and one specific thing they said: a project coming up, a problem with their last supplier, a launch date. That detail is the first line of your message.
  2. Connect early, the first day if you can. Send a LinkedIn connection request with a one-line note that mentions where you met.
  3. Send the message within days. For an introduction, reply to both people and thank the introducer. For an event contact, open with the detail you wrote down. Use the copy blocks below.
  4. Ask a real question, then propose one next step. The instinct is to send the showreel and wait. Ask one diagnostic question about what they're trying to solve, then offer a 15-minute call with a day and two times. How to word that last line is covered in How to write a follow-up email that gets a reply.
  5. Book the second touch before you send the first. Put a date in your calendar for the next message. If they don't reply, the second touch adds something useful, such as an article you came across that ties in with your conversation. Done looks like every contact from the event or introduction sitting in your calendar or CRM with a date against it.

Copy and paste: the message after a warm introduction

Subject: [Introducer's first name] introduction

Thanks for the introduction, [introducer's first name].

Hi [first name], good to meet you. [Introducer] mentioned you're [what they're working on, in the introducer's words]. Before I suggest anything, one question: [one diagnostic question about what they're trying to solve].

I've got time for a 15-minute call on [day] at [time] or [day] at [time]. Which suits you better?

[Your name]
[Phone number]

Copy and paste: the message after meeting someone at an event

Subject: Good to meet you at [event]

Hi [first name], good to meet you at [event] on [day]. You mentioned [the specific thing they said: the project, the launch, the problem with the last supplier].

One question while it's fresh: [one diagnostic question about that project or problem]?

If it's worth a conversation, I can do 15 minutes on [day] at [time] or [day] at [time]. I've also sent you a connection request on LinkedIn so you can put a face to the name.

[Your name]
[Phone number]

How to ask a happy client for a referral without it being awkward

Ask a happy client for a referral straight after they've told you, in their own words, why they hire you, so the request follows from what they've just said.

Joe Girard, the car salesman whose biggest source of business was referrals, called each customer within a week of a sale, asked for a referral if things were going well, and kept every message after that personal and useful, never a sales pitch.

  1. Pick the moment. Soon after delivery, once the client has seen the finished work and it's gone well.
  2. Ask them why they hire you. Run a short recorded interview first, so they tell you in their own words. The request email and the five questions are in How do I find out why clients really hire me?. What they say is the lead-in to the ask.
  3. Ask for the referral, then wait. Use the wording below. After the question, say nothing until they answer.
  4. Ask for the introduction. When they give you a name, ask if they'd be happy to introduce you over email. Then you're in the first copy block above.

Copy and paste: the referral ask to a past client

"Thanks for that, it means a lot. We're always looking to work with people just like you. You said some kind things there about [what they said, in their words]. Who in your network might be a good fit for the kind of work we did on [project]?"

[Wait for them to answer.]

"Would you be happy to introduce us over email?"

"Thank you, I really appreciate that."

When someone does introduce you, thank them with a short message written for that one person. When you stay in touch afterwards, send something useful with no sales message in it. If the person who referred you is also a client, the next thing you could do for them is covered in How to grow revenue from the clients you already have.

Copy and paste: the thank-you to a referrer

Subject: Thank you for the introduction to [first name]

Hi [referrer's first name],

Thank you for putting me in touch with [first name] at [company]. I appreciate you thinking of us.

[Your name]

A worked example

Here's the expo from earlier, run twice: the way it went, and the same twelve contacts on the method. The second version is a plan, not a result.

The way it went. A dozen contacts from the expo, still sitting twelve days or more later.

The same expo on the method.

WhenWhat happens
Expo day, before leavingTwelve contacts written down, each with one thing they said
The first day if you canTwelve LinkedIn connection requests, each mentioning the expo
Within daysTwelve messages, each opening with that contact's detail and ending with a question and two call times
The day the messages goA date for the second touch booked against every contact

The mistakes that undo it

The method fails in four predictable ways.

The rule of thumb for referrals and networking

Follow up a warm contact within days, by hand, while they still remember the conversation.

The benchmark for each message: one specific detail from the conversation, one question, one next step with a day and a time on it.

Hold yourself accountable

Which of these have you taken on or put in place recently?

Your one move this week

What's the one thing you can commit to implementing this week? If you're not sure, start here.

List every warm introduction and networking contact from the last month that you haven't followed up. Next to each name, write the one thing they said. Send the first three messages today, using the copy blocks above, and book a date for the rest.

One thing executed every week creates 50 strategic moves a year.

Questions like these come up regularly on our weekly Elite Boardroom calls. If you'd like someone to hold you to account each week, and to learn from a group of peers who run video businesses too, the Boardroom is for you.

Related tools and guides. How to write a follow-up email that gets a reply, How to grow revenue from the clients you already have, How to qualify a video lead before you pitch, How to show real authority on a sales call.